Scran

Tattie scones

1. Cook your potatoes and mash when done – see notes
2. In a bowl mix rub butter into the flour, kind of like when you make a crumble topping
3. Add mashed cooked potato and work into a dough, keep adding flour if it's not enough. It should resemble a kind of soft dough that holds it's shape.
4. Tip out onto a floured surface and roll gentle, keep flipping the dough and coating with flour to stop it sticking.
5. When you've got something around 5mm you're ready to cut and cook.
6. Usually these are rolled into a circle then cut into pizza-slice shaped triangles but, look, we do what we want. So I used a biscuit cutter to make circles. Whatever works innit.
7. Heat a frying pan to medium-hot, dry, no oil, nowt.
8. Prick the scones with a fork and toast on each side.
9. They should brown in spots but try not to blacken them

Lorne sausage

1. Combine all of the ingredients in a mixing bowl
2. Mush together with your hards to form a peverse paste
3. Try to make sure that the spices and seasoning are evenly distributed – see notes
4. Once amalgamated line a loaf tin with clingfilm and cram that meat in like a sleeping bag at the end of a festival
5. Get it all nice and tight
6. Leave in the fridge for up to 24 hours for it to set (or stick in the freezer for 30-60 mins)
7. When set slice into squares and fry

Sandwich

1. Put things together in something that resembles a sandwich, you don't need me to tell you